This weird floating state between to ex-lovers (please don’t generalise too much). A desire for contact, built over time, mixed with remnants of love, while trying to avoid emotions and keeping anything meaningful (topics that might hurt) out of the conversation. Sharing, but not too much. Keeping distance, but not too much. It seems like a very fragile state that needs to be upheld.

Why though? What’s there to lose?

I think it’s about vulnerability. Two ways.

On the one hand it’s a sort of self-defence against disappointment. Not hoping for things that won’t be - cannot be again, on both sides. Not getting involved in something, that might end badly.

On the other hand it’s a fear of losing someone forever. It might be out of habit. Maybe there’s something worth sustaining. A friendship, hopes, a dream. Keeping a foot in the door. Maybe you’ll need it one day.

What becomes a weird paradoxon. Not too much, not too little. Everything and nothing at the same time.